here’s what I WISH I could say…
When people ask me when we’re going to have another baby, here’s what I wish I could say to them.
Yes, I want to have another child. Like so bad. I miss the newborn snuggles, the sweet scrunchiness of a baby, I might even miss being pregnant. I like the idea of giving my son a sibling, a built in bestie, like I had with my brother growing up. I like the picture of watching two mini-me’s running around playing together and the sound of our house filled with so much noise… and love. I loved my childhood with a sibling and it is my hope that my son would love his childhood with a sibling too.
But as much as I would have love to already have a second kid,
society is not set up to support growing families.
The cost of daycare is astronomical, we would be scraping bottom just from that. We are busier than ever in our jobs, we moved farther away from the city to get more space out of a house we could afford. We don’t live by family so any time we want a date night, need a sitter, or heavens, daycare is closed, we have to pay for that extra help. And yeah, on top of paying for daycare, we have to pay for daycare even when our son is out sick…. from the germs he got from daycare. It’s a brutal cycle.
I LOVE having a kid in this crazy world, and still, it’s hard to wrap our heads around being able to support a family of 4.
Society is not set up to support growing families. Everything is expensive. We’re expected to do a million full time jobs at once, and when someone gets sick, it all comes to a halt. The care for mothers in their postpartum period is laughably dreadful. The maternity leave options are a joke. The expectations of growing families in this day in age while also trying to survive in a fast paced world, one that never shuts off and always grows more expensive, is just a little wild.
So yeah, I WANT to have another kid. I’d love to have multiple other kids. But the thought of drowning ourselves to do so is difficult to swallow.
We’re not writing off having more kids, it is very much on our radar. And the pressure to already be pregnant with baby #2 makes all of this feel a little bit worse. There is no perfect time to add to your family, and sure, we will likely be able to figure it out as we go, but when people ask me when we’re having another kid, I wish I could say “SO SOON!”
….or I wish I could say “whenever you’re ready to offer up free babysitting services and a 10% pay increase 😉
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